Do you seek the approval of others? It’s trendy to proclaim, “I don’t care what anybody thinks,” but if that were actually true you’d be a sociopath. We all want approval and acceptance from someone. The question is whose approval we want.
It’s healthy to desire the approval of your wife. If you didn’t seek her approval then you’d be a lousy husband. We should also want the approval of those we respect like mentors, close friends, and family. Basically, the people you’d take a bullet for.
The way you can tell if someone wants approval is if they explain themselves. You should only explain yourself to those whose approval you seek (wife, tribe, boss). Anyone else is a waste of your time.
Seeking the approval of the masses is damaging. Nowhere is this seen more than in heated exchanges on Facebook. When a man argues and explains things on social media to someone that he wouldn’t take a bullet for, he’s not only wasting his time, he’s also giving power to that other person.
Make a mental short list of those whose approval you truly desire. This is your “Bullet List.” Don’t waste your time debating those not listed.